How I Met My Baby Mama

A year ago today, we boarded a plane for New York City for our wedding weekend. We wanted to get married on Halloween but we settled for getting our wedding license on Halloween. Getting your wedding license in New York on Halloween is hysterical. But when you are as nervous as we were, the distraction is a good thing. We watched vampire families, ghouls, and a few day of the dead crews celebrate their Halloween nuptials as we waited and waited…and waited…It is crowded on Halloween! I thought I was in the minority with my Halloween wedding driven dreams…I completely blame Steel Magnolias. Even my brother was married the day before Halloween…He was also a fan. What’s better than a spooky themed reception, I say?!?IMG_3199

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In honor of our one year anniversary I thought I might share how we met. I will attempt make this super entertaining and as cute as I believe the experience was…However, I do not think I am that great of a storyteller but my heart is full of fondness for these moments…So let’s rewind to 2008…January 2008 to be exact. A much simpler time..when Thursday nights technically started the weekend…And it was perfectly normal to get out of class at 9 PM then meet friends to go out…and I justified staying out as I counted the hours I would be able to sleep in my head while sipping bourbon and Diet Coke…also known as delusional thoughts of a drunk girl.

If I go home at midnight, I can get 7.5 hours of sleep…that’s plenty…I will feel refreshed…no hangover

…have another drink…put in another song for karaoke…wait to sing song…

If I go home at 1 AM, then I can sleep for 6.5 hours…that’s perfect…might not even be tired…will Starbucks on the way in…Mmmm latte

…Bar has new wave of people…have another drink…decide to stay a few more minutes

OK, I will stay until closing at 2 AM then I can sleep for 5.5 hours…that’s totally enough…tomorrow is Friday and I don’t have class…Take Advil…Full make-up…I’ll just get Starbucks…No one will know I stayed out so late…I can make it to 5 PM, I’m sure…I think I need a taco.

My friend Sweet T and I were out for our usual Thursday night karaoke tragedy at Patrick’s…Whether we started there or merely made a pit stop in on the way home, Patrick’s was part of our Thursday night routine…Of course, I was singing some karaoke because I fancy myself a yet to be discovered entertainment powerhouse…I’d like to set the Patrick’s mood for you…

Patrick’s was in a part of Charleston, SC known as West of the Ashley…or West Ashley…so not down town…In an old strip mall…no windows…dimly lit on the inside…and still suffering the effects of when smoking was allowed in bars…which had not been that long ago…Most of our friends had been going there for years so the novelty had worn off or they stopped going some time during the smoky days…It was also called Patrick’s Grill and Pub or something…I have no idea if they ever sold food…But they threw the most entertaining drag shows in my opinion…so that’s where you could find us late Saturday nights as well. We always felt like the belles of the ball at Patrick’s…tragically, Patrick’s closed after I moved….Coincidence? I think not!

Back to that night…As the evening progressed, we were in our usual stance of looking beautiful but bored when a very very very intoxicated girl slid up next to me. She said she liked my shoes…they were Vans pink and brown checkerboard…I tried to carry on a more in depth conversation with her BUT it was impossible! I asked her questions but she was mostly just saying stuff about my shoes…She did make it clear that she wanted me to do a shot with her…it was a straight up shot of Jim Beam…it burnt like heck but I did it…All I could think was this hot chick is totally hitting on me…so I kept trying to talk to her…but one of her buds kept coming up…We’ll call her Toddler (later I found out Toddler was trying to hit on Lisa and they didn’t actually know each other)…so the scene was confusing but entertaining for me anyway…When Sweet T and I were ready to leave…I was no closer to getting or giving this girl my digits…mostly because communication was an issue…All I knew was that her name was Lisa and she worked for Vans and lived in Myrtle Beach…So I made a daring move…I left my number with the bartender for her…The bartender, Gerald, assured me he would pass along the message…he also incorrectly informed me that she was in a band.

Side Note: In Lisa’s version of events, she said she noticed me on a different occasion at Patrick’s and that I never noticed her. I may not have noticed her before that night but she did catch my eye that night because she was wearing a super cute argyle sweater.

Disclaimer from Lisa: She doesn’t get that drunk always…it was a girls night out…(Mmmm…Hmmm…that’s what I’d say)

She did not call/text the next day or the next…maybe Gerald forgot to give her my number…maybe she wasn’t interested…so I did what any girl does in this situation…I cyber stalked her…I didn’t have much information to use so my searches were fruitless but kept me entertained…back then people still had MySpace…she didn’t appear to be on there…I kept begging Sweet T to go to Patrick’s like every night of the week…Even on nights we went, she did not make an appearance..BUT I did not give up! We nicknamed her Lisa Vans…So while I was obsessively trolling the bars of Charleston everyone knew who I was referring to.

The search went on for like a month then one night…I was out with friends at an Indigo Girls concert with some friends…as I breezed through the lobby on a pee break I saw a girl I recognized…It was the friend who was with Lisa at Patrick’s…Looking back it is amazing that I remember meeting her…I don’t remember what was said at this point…I know we exchanged a “Hey, it’s you” moment…we became MySpace friends…and in early February Lisa texted…so we planned a first date…

But that’s a story for another day!

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Halloween 2013 – Village Parade

8 thoughts on “How I Met My Baby Mama

  1. So funny. I found out after dating my wife for a bit that she had “cyber stalked” my myspace before we even met and thought I seemed really cool, but she worried that I had a kid because I had so many pics of my niece. Good ol myspace.

    Like

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